Now then i know i was
 
wrong..

am i wrong..

today was another hazardous day for me
i feel like putting everything to the back of my head..
i don wanna think about a school.. cca.. tests... dnt.. friends.. my heart..
i just want to find a place where i can tink of nothing... nothingness.. i just don want these things let it stay in my mind.. i want to let go... of everything i have..

happiness .. sadness.. anger.. jealousy.. lameness.. all my feelings.. gone.

normal day until last part.. got physics practical.. one of my classmates took my specs to play.. den i din get it back.... now i ask around where my specs... everyone say they din take..
i was damm pissed when rusydi scolded me instead. we start a quarrel.. den pass by each other stare and scold.....

even in bus.. i can hear him scolding me.. " there's  a person same class with me sitting in front....."

after tat went to simei.. got abdominal pains in the mrt.. really sudden.. i dunno.. now not pain..
den after tat felt the dizzy and vomitting feeling again.. slammed my bag against a pole.. den felt my world spin around..  after coming down from the steps to walk to the bus stop.. i felt a sharp pain at my back.. kidney there... near to backbone too... it look my old injury.. but then it looked like kidney pain too.. i went to sit for 20 minutes in the cc... den felt better b4 going home.. then rain fell on me..

i dunno wats happening to me.. i know that something is wrong with me.. maybe its fatigue.. or.. wat. i very scared something will happen to me one day... when i am alone.. last year i suddenly collasped while playing basketball.. my back is total numb and pain... can only lie down like an idiot.. move my body one time .. back pain like siao.. but tat time friends were around me... i want to go see doctor soon.. on sunday maybe..  do a full body checkup ba..

i hope my parents allow me and accompany to see the doc.. i'm very scared.. first time in my life.. i felt.. i don wanna lose anyone in my life anymore after today's quarrel with frens and this...

after some tinking. i noe i am wrong.. how can i anyhow accuse ppl of misplacing my specs..its my own responsibility.. i better clean it up..  how do i go on apologising...

i hope. i wish. good luck to ppl taking oral tml.. u can do it one.. believe in yourself.. change other ppl 's belief to your strength.. belief overpowers anything else...

blogging out .. yH..
later i just wanna go ride bike as fast as i can.. let out my problems.. let out my feelings..  don wanna keep everything to myself again.......

sorry to anyone if i annoyed with this pesimestic post.. don scold me.. don say i am wallowing in self pity.. i just want someone who can talk with me over everything..