Pace Setting

colours lecture

1st week - discuss on what certain colours portray..
e.g,
red = wrath
yellow = bright, cheerful

Today , 2nd week, 2nd lecture

Painting a colour wheel and toning
within 1 hr 45 min.

quite impossible to do a nice one within the time frame.. luckily the lecturer had some last thoughts and let us hand up tml afternoon.


But, the pace is now on. 1st week i thought so lac, now the gradient of the slope is steeping.. the change is so fast.. the pacing they set for us is incredulous..

no wonder moses said that tp design sch pushes us the toughest.. and we are famous for "submission datelines"

I will have to concentrate and do my best to lead in the climb. but now i know i am at a disavantage because of my art skills.. but nvm, i will learn and improve.. painting is fun, but the results so far is disappointing for me

haha. but ok la. i learnt new stuff liao


hmm.


y h

Lucky

Well,

I count myself lucky to be sitting here, in my computer chair and blogging now.

i just got a brush with death again . Its been quite a day for me.

Today, i can briefly say that i am very short on temper..

I confronted lecturer, i did stupid stuffs, i comtemplated other ppl's decision, i din say hi to my friends, my bye was half heartedly.

at the end of the day, thankfully hafizah created a scenario for me to take my body back.

Hafizah if u are reading this,

YOU ARE AN INSTRUCTOR. AND NOT A BAD INSTRUCTOR. DON'T CONDEMM YOURSELF!!!

lets talk about life.

Primary 6
I almost drowned to death.. slipping down the slope in the pool, i could see my friends upstairs laughing... as i fell down and up the water. before my closing moments, another friend saved me up.

This led to my phobia in swimming.
I rank this as my one of my life threatening cases.

during sec 1 to sec 4, i had asthma attacks, falling off bike into trenches, knocking into a tree.. but i don see them as life threathening..

this yr, i had 3. does that mean something? its june and i had 3 cases.

in march, a car knock the front of my bike.. it was at full speed. one second faster, i would have been dead.

3 days ago. i board off bus 40 to drop off near campsite. within half a second, a motorcycle sped past me on a one way person pathway. 5 cm to the front, i will be dead too. pissed me off.. are motorcycles allowed on the first place on one-man pathways? and a speeding one somemore..

today, as i ride home frm campsite, a split second after riding through a block, a glass object dropped just behind me... and i could hear the splinter hitting my bike.

a second later, i would have not blogged.

i am a blessed man.

otherwise. my devil and angel has found a new home to blog their differences.

and it won be at dreamythots. it will be at a place only one other person know.


y h

It must be me.

anyway.. going to go sch soon, so keep this entry short.

throught the 3 days i spent at campsite, i suffered some physical injuries. nvm abt that.

tired? not exactly. just worn out.

i booked into campsite with a sicky body. if anyone bothered to notice, i was using irregular amounts of tissue. and i forgot my panadol.

but all these is not the issue.

i am just disappointed by stuff tat i have seen.

shall blog those later. it will be the devil blogging.


y h

I Conclude

more or less, i am a person to be remembered for a moment of shock/laughter in camps. But i am not a person of high popularity in camp. I will not be conversed by large grps of ppl. I will not be the first person they go to.

i am more of a follower than a leader.

ok.

anyway.. design orientation 05 is over.. and i must say, though the planning lacked contingency plans... the effort put in was tremendous.. for the first time, i jam and hopped till i crazy, dizzy and tired... lets start

Wednesday - day 3 camp

ok the spirit of russett suddenly plunged on this day.. lesser ppl coming.. and i found myself sticking to this grp of 4, jason, clarence, victor, me. though i am the least attention giving one, i can organise well within the 4 of us.. nothing much for day 1, but DESIGN MASS DANCE ROCKS!! hahaha. i love design so much.. and chickie dance.. oh my god. haha.. i never loved it so much... all the cheers rock la..

DESIGN! ENGINE TEH!!!!

eh eh eh eh eh eh eh ...

DESIGN! ENGINE TEH!!!

eh eh eh eh eh eh eh ...

DESIGN! ENGINE TEH!!!

eh eh eh.. pi po pi po... bang.. eh eh eh eh... bang..

the above is our response to engineering sch whenever we see them.. hahah.. lol. engine so big..their population is 3 times our size.. yet their cheer softer than us. hahahaha... and we will always do our " eh wu sa eh, wu sa wu sa eh, hey! " cheer to them.. then they diam diam liao...

after that we went to sentosa for scavenger hunt... ok la.. alot of the ppl find it tiring .. i found it ok compared to red cross standard.. but well.. nothing much to say la huh.. since i am from a training side, while this camp is merely orientation... but the sentosa thing bored us alot la... until jason had to dress as a shim!!

shim = breed of male and female combined. she + him

Thursday - Day 2

hmmm.. can't remember much, except the camp left 4 guys only... but the cheers still rock la... performance nite.. not many ppl enthu.. but it saw an amazing 20 over guys cross dressers!!!!!

and mind u they are wearing girl's stuff... make up, bikinis, mini skirts, halter tops... tube.. whatever!!!.. even one was wearing a swimming costume!!! WTTF!!!

was abit reluctant to go jam and hop.. but soon found myself swaying with da crowd.. and it was the first time i felt so fun dancing.. it made me forget everythign but dancing.. danced till i dizzy, tired...

Friday - Day 3

now we had combined into one design sch, to get ready for the final clash with other schs later on.. though our population is the least.. yet we had the spirit..

DESIGN! RESPONSE NO. 1!

*digs ear with an exaggerated look, and flinks it out at other sch!

DESIGN! RESPONSE NO. 2!

*makes f*** u sign language in italian, and shouts u want to eat?????

DESIGN! RESPONSE NO. 3!

*makes a stupid expression and moan, and then suddenly tilt forward the head and rapidly point at the top of the head, while making a "TI TI TI TI TI" sound... (this one damm cute and fun sia)

DESIGN! RESPONSE NO. 4!

SEA WEED!!! (sounds like weet weet.. but we say like this.. fun!)

DESIGN! RESPONSE NO. 5!

Somebody's gonna get hurt.. real bad.. somebody! (from russells peters comedy show, though i prefered that we say " BE A MAN! DO THE RIGHT THING! " in a stupid tone)

DESIGN! RESPONSE NO. 6!

We are creative ppl!!!

i participated in the telematch.. well its not well organised.. our design sch got shortchanged.. but whatever.. the dragon boat regatta... then everything ended.. but ok la.. though we lost the overall best grp trophy to business sch after 7 straight years of holding it.. we won the best spirited school!!!.. design spirit rocks.. we were all damm enthu... hahahhaa

Design OI!!!

OI!!!!

DESIGN OI!!!!

OI!!!!!

DESIGN OI!!!!

SUP SUP OI!!!!


----

DESIGN TO K05!
Always on the boat ah!
DESIGN TO K05!
Always on the boat ah!
Talk cock sing song we are the best ah!
Talk cock sing song we are the best ah!
DESIGN TO K05, ALWAYS ON THE BOAT AH!!!

-----

Fight like champions fight fight!
Score like champions score score!
Fight like champions!
Score like champions!
All the rest can go fly kite!
Fly kite fly kite all the rest can go fly kite~~~
ha ha ha ha ha~
ne ne ne ne ne~
BLEAH!

---

i din go for oeverall tp sch jam and hot.. cos next day got rc contact session... design finale was great.. we had a big big hug... and they splashed buckets of water from the top on us... damm great...


i love design..


y h

I Conclude

more or less, i am a person to be remembered for a moment of shock/laughter in camps. But i am not a person of high popularity in camp. I will not be conversed by large grps of ppl. I will not be the first person they go to.

i am more of a follower than a leader.

ok.

anyway.. design orientation 05 is over.. and i must say, though the planning lacked contingency plans... the effort put in was tremendous.. for the first time, i jam and hopped till i crazy, dizzy and tired... lets start

Wednesday - day 3 camp

ok the spirit of russett suddenly plunged on this day.. lesser ppl coming.. and i found myself sticking to this grp of 4, jason, clarence, victor, me. though i am the least attention giving one, i can organise well within the 4 of us.. nothing much for day 1, but DESIGN MASS DANCE ROCKS!! hahaha. i love design so much.. and chickie dance.. oh my god. haha.. i never loved it so much... all the cheers rock la..

DESIGN! ENGINE TEH!!!!

eh eh eh eh eh eh eh ...

DESIGN! ENGINE TEH!!!

eh eh eh eh eh eh eh ...

DESIGN! ENGINE TEH!!!

eh eh eh.. pi po pi po... bang.. eh eh eh eh... bang..

the above is our response to engineering sch whenever we see them.. hahah.. lol. engine so big..their population is 3 times our size.. yet their cheer softer than us. hahahaha... and we will always do our " eh wu sa eh, wu sa wu sa eh, hey! " cheer to them.. then they diam diam liao...

after that we went to sentosa for scavenger hunt... ok la.. alot of the ppl find it tiring .. i found it ok compared to red cross standard.. but well.. nothing much to say la huh.. since i am from a training side, while this camp is merely orientation... but the sentosa thing bored us alot la... until jason had to dress as a shim!!

shim = breed of male and female combined. she + him

Thursday - Day 2

hmmm.. can't remember much, except the camp left 4 guys only... but the cheers still rock la... performance nite.. not many ppl enthu.. but it saw an amazing 20 over guys cross dressers!!!!!

and mind u they are wearing girl's stuff... make up, bikinis, mini skirts, halter tops... tube.. whatever!!!.. even one was wearing a swimming costume!!! WTTF!!!

was abit reluctant to go jam and hop.. but soon found myself swaying with da crowd.. and it was the first time i felt so fun dancing.. it made me forget everythign but dancing.. danced till i dizzy, tired...

Friday - Day 3

now we had combined into one design sch, to get ready for the final clash with other schs later on.. though our population is the least.. yet we had the spirit..

DESIGN! RESPONSE NO. 1!

*digs ear with an exaggerated look, and flinks it out at other sch!

DESIGN! RESPONSE NO. 2!

*makes f*** u sign language in italian, and shouts u want to eat?????

DESIGN! RESPONSE NO. 3!

*makes a stupid expression and moan, and then suddenly tilt forward the head and rapidly point at the top of the head, while making a "TI TI TI TI TI" sound... (this one damm cute and fun sia)

DESIGN! RESPONSE NO. 4!

SEA WEED!!! (sounds like weet weet.. but we say like this.. fun!)

DESIGN! RESPONSE NO. 5!

Somebody's gonna get hurt.. real bad.. somebody! (from russells peters comedy show, though i prefered that we say " BE A MAN! DO THE RIGHT THING! " in a stupid tone)

DESIGN! RESPONSE NO. 6!

We are creative ppl!!!

i participated in the telematch.. well its not well organised.. our design sch got shortchanged.. but whatever.. the dragon boat regatta... then everything ended.. but ok la.. though we lost the overall best grp trophy to business sch after 7 straight years of holding it.. we won the best spirited school!!!.. design spirit rocks.. we were all damm enthu... hahahhaa

Design OI!!!

OI!!!!

DESIGN OI!!!!

OI!!!!!

DESIGN OI!!!!

SUP SUP OI!!!!


----

DESIGN TO K05!
Always on the boat ah!
DESIGN TO K05!
Always on the boat ah!
Talk cock sing song we are the best ah!
Talk cock sing song we are the best ah!
DESIGN TO K05, ALWAYS ON THE BOAT AH!!!

-----

Fight like champions fight fight!
Score like champions score score!
Fight like champions!
Score like champions!
All the rest can go fly kite!
Fly kite fly kite all the rest can go fly kite~~~
ha ha ha ha ha~
ne ne ne ne ne~
BLEAH!

---

i din go for oeverall tp sch jam and hot.. cos next day got rc contact session... design finale was great.. we had a big big hug... and they splashed buckets of water from the top on us... damm great...


i love design..


y h

FIGHTING LIKE CHAMPIONS!!!

oh my.. first day of orientation - Monday.

wasn particulary looking fwd to it.. and well.. it did disappoint me.. its really damm disorganised.. and i felt if i was in the planning role... i could have done a better job.. but nevertheless.. they put in effort.. so tat is commendable..

another point is cos my grp makes very sian like tat.. all no enthusiasm.. then bloody boring la.. then whole day run tired like wat.. so in the end.. felt so stupid... yes. at times the grp needed leaders... but i just wasn gonna commit myself to something i didn felt anything for...

but made a few friends on first day.. namely russell, clarence and sherly. ok. i admit sherly did appeal to me.. and she asked me after the day if she could take the same bus back to interchange.. but somehow she changed her mind... but well.. i was so happy.. BUT THEN.

SHE IS 174 CM TALL!!! OH NO!!!....

ok. why all good girls i have met are so bloody tall.. leaving me with absolutely no chance!
and she is in different course!! she is the type of person who is only interested in knowing same course ppl!! VSC..... why so many ppl join VSC.... hai!!!

ok la enough of this some crazed crap i am having.

2nd day orientation

WAY WAY BETTER.. becos of jason who went super siao on enthu and not forgetting crazy and lame... he said he will be like tat if he eats his breakfast.. and today he ate!!

also clarence and victor.. who are also from FOC.. actually they 3 all from FOC (Freshman orientation camp).... and add me inside... then we inspire others to join in our craziness.. then at the end of the day.. russett became a much different team from yesterday.. everybody so enthu la.. wa liao.. our cheers loudest, best. and during station games we won both of our games against varidian and lime who had the unluckiest opponents.. before rain stopped our conquest...

but nevertheless.. i am much more looking fwd to the last 3 days of orientation now.. with the new RUSSETT!!..

RUSSETT ROCKS!



y h

p.s : btw, my grp mates commented on my loud loud voice in cheering =D!

Tired


I made a Quiz for You on QuizYourFriends.com

CLICK on the link below or PASTE it into your browser.
http://www.quizyourfriends.com/yourquiz.php?quizname=050515140516-39887

i am very unsure for my orientation, myself and my course, and my future.


y h

Kebebasan

Kebebasan.

Freedom in malay.

today, or rather yesterday at 11.59.59pm was my last second of freedom.

anyway. how do u judge freedom? leisure? doing wat u like? doing wat u want? no restrictions?

i guess it could be any of those ba.


From tomorrow onwards, it would be never the same anymore.
aids memorial 2006. how well i remembered aids memorial 2004. how much i remembered trying to find her, yet couldn't and struck by a killer sentence.

" Don bother finding her, she's with him. "

Well. its 1 yr since. i shdn brood over it.

I was thrown into deep thought as i stood in the train today.. i saw many young siblings.. some playing with each other, some enjoying each other's comfort.. some won't give way to each other.. but yet remain on close terms.

what am i to my brother?

I so much want to find out. i so much yearn for him to read this post, though i am pretty sure he won't get to read these lines.

its been a long long time since our last childish quarrel set us apart. in the past, there were many quarrels and fights. but everytime we got back by wrestling with each other..

but the last fight seemed to have sizzle all tat we had.

and if i am correct, i was the one who started it.

And he din even retaliate. I knew he was weaker than i am. yet i threw punches at him, kicked him out of anger.

From then on, i knew it was over. How much i regret tat. Getting angry with him over such a small and trival stuff..

today, he left his hp on my desk b4 leaving for soccer... then i out of curiousity read some of his msgs (well i know it is wrong.. but.)

he replied in response to his friend's question of where he was.

" i at home nw with my bro ah. doing nothing much. "

i was very touched by the "with my bro"

i do hope some day we will patch back.. right now its too awkward... though i tried and he tried..


next, i was really skeptical of myself before asking yl if i can join.. cos .

well.. this is a reason within my own heart.. so well...

but last, though the beginning i tried too hard to push it .. after a few games of dota with sganime... i felt more comfortable.. the feeling is just great..

they are a bunch of fantastic ppl. i truly consider them to be one of the best grps of ppl i have known..

i'm really glad by a motivational line by u.

me : its been a long time since my last outing.
u : isn this counted as an outing?

=)


on a lighter note.. i now can drive daytona beginner on manual!!! i can use manual gear to drive!!!.. yay!!


y h

Terrorised


maybe i am just taking a stand.

maybe my role is as simple as it seems.

i am used to it.

the feeling in the beginning will be very nice, warm, friendly, new.

but as time goes by,

the feeling will be displaced.

and i will fade,

though i will still play a role which i always do.

that is to be in corners, while maintaining my usual toast of concern and help.


maybe this is how i will turn out to be..


a secret guardian that no one will notice.



y h

Limits

my own limits are reaching.

i know it when, i woke up tiredly today at 12pm, b4, taking a quick bath and heading to pasir ris for my blood donor recruitment, at first did not do well.. was beginning to reflect on my own words on volunteering.. and yc's words on interest.

then i was wondering, if it is this lack of interest that is pulling ppl away...

now i understand.

but, as time went on, i teamed up with the team leader, and finally got the interest tat began to fuel me, though i was working on an empty stomach, mind and soul.

how i wish my energy had replenished

but at least our combined efforts managed 19 new blood donors..

i am super satisfied and proud of what i have done for red cross.


though that satisfaction never gave me enough response to my demon.


i was very glad, though, when i reached dhoby ghaut. and saw mr tang chun tuck, in his full uniform, doing recruitment. haa.... at least at that moment, i took over my own body. and smiled...

y h

Please do believe me

its hard to believe myself nowadays again..

i somehow,

the angel in my heart, somehow told me that, if i say this view, it means this view, and i won't change my view. and i have been rather forceful of late, trying to put my view only. i am the leader, and there is no other. ppl must listen to me, and not the other way round.

the angel blasted my head and my will.

then the devil made a pact and told me that what i am doing is right.

i find it so difficult to believe why i am doing such things lately.


today, however, i did believe myself, for that moment. i know that moment is super precious to me. because i did see myself through my real reflection. i did know that at that time, i was not affected by my angels and demons. at that time, i know what i was doing couldn't be wrong..

but .

it lasted for seconds. soon. i was hard again. it was painful.

now, i try and try to battle out my inner insecurities, while trying to make the right decisions.. yet each time i will fall.

i am rather tired.

this few nights of relentless assaults on me by my consciousness has knocked me out. i am sick and tired of them.

otherwise, i will treasure that moment of truth. when i truly witnessed my tear drop.

i am not a man without emotions afterall..

thank goodness.


y h

If.

what if the devil hadn struck me?

right now, the angel within me has told me not to lose faith..

always believe..

so have my heart succumbed to the dark side?

am i really a devil more than an angel?




haiz.



gotta spend the night doing some impt stuff.. seriously, the bowl of ba chor mee, only made my life more sleepy.

today i committed so many sins.


alas. i found myself alighting at simei, becos i forgot abt my stop. it was too late for another train.. and i decided to take the route on which i did last yr. i walked exactly the same path.. mirana cake shop, the row of shops, everything. i remember everything . except, the one walking beside me was just my shadow..

my discuses has given me the bright spark today..

otherwise, dark, dark and darker.


how i wish i believe that, the phrase i saw today will be true.

"the impossible was yesterday"


y h

updates


on wednesday, decided to go to chalet despite feeling sicker than ever.

and well.. i ride bike whole day.. haha damm fun. so long never been on a bike.. wah. then tried riding on ys rented bike. wah super nice. i want tat bike. so smooth and effortless.. i love it.. i ride that bike without using any energy at high speed, so super nice. the gears were good too.

and i can ride handless for 5 seconds.. hahahah!

have to sit upright and ride at normal speed while doing tat though.


at night played a pub game. and damm my luck is just damm good la.

lose only 2 times compared to poh boon sir who had to drink so many cups of alchohol.. i only drank 2. well. i regretted not losing while they serve whiskey coke. i had some mouthful after the game which happened to be the last cup of whiskey coke and though it din smell nice. it tasted great!

i know i am sick and i should drink. but then, drink small amount won harm ah. anyway.. i think my drinking limits improved too.. since i drank 43% without even feeling hot. LOL. on the other hand, brose went high after a cup. u can see his super red face and dry towel!

quite a fun day.

my last fishes, the 3 discuses, 2 of them, the couple has fallen into the prey of the sickness. both of them the eyes, the right eyes are now blinded.

i guess.
after this wave.

not gonna keep pets for a damm long time.


y h

My angel of music came upon and swept my legs away from the ground..


It seems tat my pain has evolved into a numb feeling.

as if my pain has been kissed away.

well.

i am still sick (WOW RECORD)

but not terrible la. just can't go out in case spread to other ppl.


i got in touch with nostalgia.

is everything gonna be the same when i go back this yr. how is everyone now? is the river still young and childlike? how is him? how is her? are we gonna be the same again? is my brother gonna patch up with me again. are we going to get on better terms again? my grandma, is she in good health? hows the village? hows the cats, dogs and everything?

well. i have too many questions ba.

i really cannot wait.

for december holidays.


y h